50 Strange Buildings of the World

50 Strange Buildings of the World

Bell, Book & Candle: Avast, Ye Scurvy Bilge-Rats!

Bell, Book & Candle: Avast, Ye Scurvy Bilge-Rats!

Paul would have dug this!

Hmm, why am I not prominently featured on this site?

Probably because he's never met me :)

Badass of the Week.

Quote of the Day

"I'm the queen of 'Think again, mother-fucker!'"

---Kate

Quote(s) of the day

"God is dead" - Nietzsche, 1882

"Nietzsche is dead" - God, 1900

Stay thin, obey your man

Link:



A SELF-help guide that tells women to stay thin and follow their man's orders if they want to keep him has become a bestseller.

The book, The Re-education Of The Female, also says women should wear sexy clothes while doing the cooking and cleaning.

Copies of first-time author Dante Moore's book have been flying off the shelves in the US, Britain's Daily Mail reports.

One piece of advice reads: "Men never really ask for anything. They command. And believe me, what you won't do, 10 broads around the corner will."

Advising women to stay slim to attract men, Moore also writes: "When you go to the grocery store to shop, do you pick out the nastiest-looking, most rotten, smelliest fruit or meat you can find?

"Oh you don't? Why not? It's the same with men when they see ... baby elephant-sized, out-of-shape women."

Moore, a 33-year-old computer engineer, says he wants to help women and wrote the book to show where they go wrong in relationships.

Moore himself has never married, has a girlfriend of two years, an 11-year-old son from a previous relationship and says he has never found true love.

Quote of the Day

"Don't think duct tape is going 2 fix this"

My unnamed friend, upon hearing horrible clank-clang-rumble-grind sounds from his CB750, just prior to it's complete cessation of operation.

Cool new blog

One Good Dog

It's just starting out, but it promises to be good :)

Hilton auditions for Nazi Orgymaster

You know what I hate? Those big fucking sunglasses that are all the rage. I mean, sure, they've been "popular" for a year or more now, but they suck. They suck now, they sucked last year, and they sucked in the fucking 70s. Just because they're retro doesn't make them cool. You know what else is retro? Outhouses and yellow fever. Want to bring those back into fashion, too? I can see it now. "Next on MTV Cribs... Check out P. Diddy's outhouse. 'Yeah, I had this marble imported from Europe, you know, to make the ass platform. That's not brass on the door handle, that's 10k, man.' We'll get to see this and more after these messages. Yellow fever got you worried? There's no cure, but there is a vaccination. Get one now! Brought to you by RAYF, Rockers Against Yellow Fever."

We have hijacked your baby

Oh, man. The more I run that little 125 in the back yard, the better it runs. I'm going to try and pull the spare rim tonight & put the new tire on it. I found the tail light assembly (only missing one turn signal cover). It's getting closer...

I don't know about this

Polygamy is the key to a long life.

Of course, one comment I spotted on the net I thought was particularly apt:
"I told my wife about this, and she said that if I tried to bring a second wife into the house, it would drastically reduce my lifespan... she'd kill me!"

:)

Ah, the hazards of marriage.

Specifically, getting dressed in the dark.

I was in a hurry to get dressed this morning. Since my darling love was able to sleep in, I was attempting to get dressed in the dark, using a little LED flashlight to find my clothes in the closet. Pants - check. Shirt - check. I'll wear this blue one, it looks like she ironed it for me, too! (she often irons my clothes. I've not asked her to, but it's nice & I appreciate it when she does).

One big problem. Or little problem. When I pulled the shirt on, I noticed the shoulders felt a bit tight. The sleeves came up almost to my elbows, and the chest was *awfully* loose.

Yep, I tried to wear one of her shirts to work today. Luckily, even my ineptitude noticed before I got out the door, and I was able to change into one of my own.

It's *almost* alive!

I've been kicking this around for a while. It was my first bike, back when I was 14. A 1982 CB125s. As I've been pretty broke, I figured I'd see what all I could do with it, for almost free. It's a little bike, but it makes a good starter bike.

Well, I poured some Marvel Mystery Oil into the cylinder & kicked it over a few times. Got decent compression & *spark*! Turned out the plug wasn't cross threaded, just dirty threads. Cleaned them up, put the plug in. Ok, what next. Old-ass 6v battery needed water, so I filled it up with *distilled* water (NOT tap water...) Knew it was dead, but plugged it in anyway. Squirt some starting fluid into the carb and kick, kick, kick, VROOM!

Well, it will run as long as you keep squirting it with go-juice. I hooked up a fiberglass tracker tank, and fuel is getting into the float bowl. I *have* cleaned & rebuilt this carb... a year or more ago. Plus, it was my first ever carb clean & rebuild. Since I've done the 4 'wing carbs a few times, I'm sure I screwed the cleaning of this simple little carb. Gonna pull it tonight & clean it more. Hopefully I'll be riding up & down the street before the night is over...

One last pic of me & my gf at the time. I sure looked funny at 15 :)

I kissed a girl

Here's a new game from the guys at rathergood.com. It's Astrogirl, featuring Lindsay Lohan. Rock on!

She had to do it, the 11yo was kicking her ass!

Deputy Shocks Girl With Taser At Elementary School.

They both ended up at the hospital. The little girl to get the taser prongs removed, and the deputy for bruised sinus cavities, or something like that.

I have to say, if I were a cop, the day I needed a taser to take down an 11yo girl is the day I'd turn in my badge...

I hope Otto keeps the coyotes from eating my body

Dog guarded owner's body for 6 weeks after his suicide in remote area.

Aw, hell. Who do I think I'm kidding. Otto would be too busy eating my face to worry about any damn coyotes...

Pretty worthless

So far everything is going great with the new marriage. A few issues dealing with things I've done in the past, but nothing insurmountable. *I* know I won't be doing anything like that in the future, but it still takes time to heal.

She's been doing the whirlwind cleaning on the house. Living there as a (basically) single dad for the past year things really built up. Not the unhealthy things like food in the corners or plates under the bed. Things like "I moved the bed today to vacuum, and the pile of dust & dog hair opened it's eyes and asked me to leave it alone" type of thing. You know, I never would have thought to actually *move* furniture to clean around it. I was doing good to sweep the visible floors.

Mostly I feel worthless. Everybody has a different style, and a different preference for maintaining their living space. I'm a "don't leave it out if it will rot, and pile up everything that you may, at some point, someday, need" kind of person. She's most definitely not. Add to that things that I have very few preferences over, such as wall colors, wallpaper, furniture placement, etc. and there's not much I feel confident in contributing. I see all the hard work she's put in, and I want to do something to help, but I just don't know where to start. (Obviously, if I did, it would have been done *before* she moved in). Oh, I can handle things like taking out the trash, or move this here. I replaced the sink faucet, but she unclogged using some home remedy stuff that was top secret (I asked what it was, but she said she had to use TWO pairs of gloves and wouldn't elaborate). I managed to change the locks, and when I realized a standard lock wouldn't work in the security door, I was able to re-pin it. I *almost* got the kitchen window blind replaced, but after I got the mounts in I realized they need to go on the outside of the frame, not the inside. DOH! I can fix that tonight, though. But for simple, everyone should know stuff, I screw it up. I was supposed to put the towels in the dryer last night, and almost as soon as she asked me to, I forgot. DOH!

Oh well. I'll keep trying. Eventually I'll get it right :)

My truck is weird

The a/c just can't make up it's mind whether it wants to work or not. It alternates between not having any cold air blowing, and blowing so cold a stream of white frostiness comes poring out. I bet if I sprinkled water, it would snow...

Nazi Toddlers Ruined My Birthday

You gotta love some of the subjects they use for spam. I see a LOT since I'm the one who goes through the quarantine at work.

I just wanted to post this video real quick :)

We are all monkeys

Why not use nuclear power in space?

I'm still fleshing some of this out in my head, but I was reading an article on the ISS, and one thing that was mentioned was power issues. If you move it too much, the solar panels can no longer collect enough solar energy.

Why not use a miniature nuclear reactor? Shield it well, and tether it to the station. Could it really generate more damaging radiation than, say, the sun?

Cool little optical illusion

Looks like a cat running.

Oh, I bet I'm in trouble for this one...

How to Make a Woman Happy

It's not difficult to make a woman happy.
A man only needs to be:

1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynaecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate


WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:

45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls


AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

51.. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes


IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

54. Never to forget:
Birthdays
Anniversaries
Aarrangements she makes








HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY
1. Show up naked
2. Bring food

Holy Arrest Record, Batman!

The Dynamic Duo was arrested in Ibiza. Interestingly enough, The Joker was present, but innocent of any wrong-doing. What is the world coming to???

No, I'm not going to forget

Geez. Ok, I am forgetful. I'm kinda flaky. Still, I don't think it was really necessary for Kate to write the date of the wedding on the bathroom mirror. I won't forget. Honest. I *know* it's the 19th, and I'll be there promptly at 6pm!!!

I will not, however, be wearing a hawaiian shirt...

I guess I better

If I were a better blogger I'd type it up myself, instead I'll just point you to Kate's post about the upcoming event.

What I want to know is who's taking me to the strip club???

Ruff!

Which Breed Of Dog Is Most Aggressive?

Quick answer: Dachshund

What I found interesting was towards the bottom. ...some of the lowest scoring breeds for aggression included the Basset hound, golden retriever, Labradors...

I'd always heard that Labs bite more people each year than Pitbulls. Maybe it's a case of there being more Labs, but a lower percentage are aggressive. I can't find anything concrete to back this up. However, I did find American Temperament Test Society, Inc. According to their testing data:
Breed Name Tested Passed Failed Percent
LABRADOR RETRIEVER 705 647 58 91.8%
AMERICAN PIT BULL TERRIER 586 494 92 84.3%
BASSET HOUND 33 28 5 84.8%
CHIHUAHUA 37 26 11 70.3%
GERMAN SHEPHERD DOG 2875 2,401 474 83.5%
GOLDEN RETRIEVER 703 592 111 84.2%
SCOTTISH TERRIER 33 21 12 63.6%

Well, You can go to the site & look up whatever breed you want...

Super Glue

It's got all kind of uses. Including surgery. I haven't needed it for that lately, but I just think it's interesting.

D-cup or above only

The search for an iPod charging bra...

BMX Sidehacks?

Sidecars for BMX bikes...

Looks pretty cool, though :P

SO9

I'm back. I'll post more later, but for now here's the pics:
Smoke Out 9 Pics

Here's a teaser of me & Rich:

Quote of the Day

In fact, Flash-based web sites are quite possibly one of the most useful pieces of network technology around. Like heroin or microlights, they ensure that those who think it's a good idea aren't around to annoy us for too long.

Here's a cool Herbie for ya.

No, not Herbie Hancock, a newer, better version of Herbie the Love Bug.

It's a jet-powered Beetle (new)!!!



Be sure to scroll down & check out his new project... The JetScooter!

He wasn't going to give it up willingly!

Toad unharmed by tenure in dog's stomach

You mean the dog was eating too fast to notice a frog had wandered in among his snacks? Say it isn't so!

Starting to stress a bit

Less than a week to go, and the bike still isn't ready. I got started putting the carbs back together last night, only to discover missing screws. :(

For the most part, though, it's clean(ish) and ready to go. Once I pick up new screws tonight, I should be able to put it mostly back together, then finish when the mixture screws come in. $15 each for 4 of them, damn....

I especially dig the coffee cup at the end

It can *not* print itself!!!

Specifically, what about all the metal tubes & the wires?

RepRap - Open Source Machine 'Prints' 3-D Objects, Including Copies Of Itself

RepRap is short for replicating rapid-prototyper. RepRap employs a technique called ‘additive fabrication’. The machine works a bit like a printer, but rather than squirting ink onto paper, it puts down thin layers of molten plastic which solidify. These layers are built up to make useful three-dimensional (3D) objects.

Wine is fine...

Demotivational Posters By Demotivate Us!

Good advice

We were walking through Target last night, and Ramona, out of the blue, says to me:

"Always wear quiet shoes when you're going to kill somebody."

Apparently she was watching the Godfather at her mom's house...

The ultimate point & click interface

The Disconnect Between Range Marksmanship & Combat Hitsmanship

It has been assumed that if a man can hit a target at 50 yards he can
certainly do the same at three feet. That assumption is not borne out by the
reports.

AIMED Point Shooting or P&S For Self Defense has a lot of information on ways to get around this problem. Scroll down about halfway & you should see some pretty (har har) pictures. Browse around, there's plenty to read there.

Score!

I was talking to Rich last night, both of us were "woe is me" ing about our bike builds. Wrong Way beeps in, but I ignore it, I'll call him later. He immediately called again. Well, everybody knows if someone calls twice in a row you better answer. So I clicked over & hear "hey man, do you want to go get some shingles for the garage?"

Turns out Matthew was at a friend's house, and their landlord had shingles put on the roof, and they put the excess on the street with the rest of the trash. So we drove over & loaded up the car. We got at least enough to do one half of the garage, and probably enough for the whole thing.

A free new garage roof! I'm especially thrilled because it's been leaking, and it really needs to be done. I'm not so thrilled about the weekend worth of work it's going to take to do it :(

Typical sensationalist pseudojournalism

Arrest leads to acres of goods aka Old Man Trying To Get By On Fixed Income Unfairly Represented In The Media.

Joe Henderson, of Senatobia, Tate County, MS is my uncle. Most of this story is a non-story. First of all, the "acres of goods"? He has a junkyard! It's officially closed, but once you get into junk, it's hard to stop.

When you buy & sell junk, you typically deal in cash, which is where that comes in. The stolen goods? I know Joe, and he wouldn't knowingly deal in stolen goods. That doesn't mean everything that went through the yard was clean, he just wouldn't deal with hot merch if he knew.

Now the weed... well, I don't know about that. I can't see an old man in failing health being a big time drug trafficker, but I suppose it's possible. I figure someone probably stashed it on the property, and he got busted for it. Hell, he might have pissed the cops off enough for them to set him up.

Mostly, though, he's just a Good Ol' Boy. Think Uncle Jesse from the Dukes of Hazzard, only a bit more of an asshole. He's the kind of guy that wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire, but if your car broke down & you were going to lose your job & you had kids... He'd be most likely to throw you some keys & say "eh, take that green Chevy, pay me when you can."

I sure hope it turns out ok. He's too fucking old for prison.

An old one from gramma

I was looking through old emails looking for something & found this email from gramma:

PET RULES

To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height.

Dear Dogs and Cats,
The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years --canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt.
I cannot stress this enough!
(additional note from jred: This goes for drinking out of the toilet, too)

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets:
1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3 Are easier to train
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't want to wear your clothes
10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and...
11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

I'm super cereal

You know what really bugs me? People who don't know how to open cereal. It's not that hard. Don't tear up the flaps opening the box. When you do, the box doesn't close properly. Don't just rip open the bag, which usually results in a split running down the center. Just pull the top apart. This leaves the bag in a condition where you can pour it without it going everywhere. It also keeps cereal from falling between the bag & box. As an added bonus, you can easily reseal the bag to keep it fresh. Speaking of which, how hard is it to roll up the bag when you're done???

On a completely unrelated note, caramel mocha Java Chillers from Sonic rock!

This looks like something Paul & I would've done

Mistake & all :) Once we made up some homemade napalm. Shaved some ivory into gasoline in a double-boiler. Let it cool, and splashed it across the street. Lit it, then hid in the bushes to watch the cars line up on either side. Those were the days...

Wrong-way!

Went riding with Jerry last night, since it was bike night & all. Rode down to Beale St. to hang out with some of his buddies. It was alright. Not too many cool bikes. A couple of sporties & a couple of old jap bikes. It was ok, though, and the impending rain kept the crowd down. My soda was watery, though. I guess they mostly use them for mixers...

After Beale St. we wanted to ride some more, so we hopped on the interstate :O and went out to Joe's Crabshack. It was closing, but we got to pee :) Mainly I wanted to try the new bike out on the istate. It went swimmingly well. The wind was a little bad, but not too bad. Oh, and apparently cleaning the connectors on my battery cables helped. When we left Joe's, I was able to start the wing warm, with no starting fluid or jump box. Yay! for that!

Ah, yes. Wrong-way. Well, on the way to Beale, we passed a cop & I was thinking it was a good thing we both had decent looking helmets. We pulled up to a red light as I was still pondering this, and my gaze turned to Jerry... And the DOT sticker on his forehead! The DOT sticker is on the *back* of the helmet, which means his helmet was on backwards! I nearly forgot to tell his guys about it, we were leaving and I hopped back off the bike to go tell them. As we left, Bones yelled out "See ya later, Wrong-way!" I can't wait for Jerry to show up with a new name patch. He deserves a nickname like Wrong-way for wearing his helmet backwards :)

Ok, they're a *little* more expensive

than the ones in the back of comic books.

X-ray specs! Only $2400!!!

Rock out!

Oh! Mighty hunter!

Alright, this has gone just about far enough. Last night I was headed back to the desk and noticed an eviscerated dog toy. Except it wasn't. It was a bird. Not eviscerated, thankfully, but very dead. I figured one of the pups had found a dead bird outside and brought it in to play with. I disposed of it properly, and didn't think much about it.

Until this morning. I let the dogs out & propped the door open so they could get all their morning duties (or doodies harhar) out of the way. Guess what I found. Another bird! It absolutely wasn't the same one. So I disposed of this one, too.

I'm pretty sure it's not Otto. I think if he was a mighty bird hunter, he couldn't have hidden it for three years. It must be Flomar. Who'd have thunk it?

Almost as good as a sidecar...

Wow! Free wifi!

"Apparently, Apple and AT&T has decided to provide free wireless access to iPhone users at places like Starbucks."

The thing is, with a little "modification" aka HAX, you can make it work on your laptop, too.


More info

Honest, baby! It's not me!!!

There was this woman, see. She loved to watch porn. One day, she loads up a porno, and what does she *think* she sees? Her boyfriend! On the screen! With... some OTHER bitch!!!

Fuck THAT! I'll go Lorena Bobbit on his ass!

Want to save gas?

Eat less beans! Har har!

Actually, I was going to suggest "hypermiling".

I first heard about it in this Reuters article..

My step-dad is to blame for this JOTD

How the fight started:

Officer, this is how the fight started...
I rear-ended the car in front of me. I admit that. It was my fault.
So, we both pull over to the side of the road, and slowly the driver of the car I hit gets out of his car. ... . and you know how you just-get-sooo-stressed... and life... sometimes life seems like... suddenly funny?

Well, the driver of the car I hit is a DWARF! He gets out of his car and I get out of my car.
He is frowning and scowling and he storms over to me. Right up close at me he looks up in my face and says, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!'

And I don't know what possessed me, officer, but I look down at him and I said, 'Well, if you're not Happy -- which one are you?'

.. . . and that's when the fight started...

skatelife memphis: Fairgrounds April 24rth Skate Demo- the dawn of a new era for the Memphis Skate Community

skatelife memphis: Fairgrounds April 24rth Skate Demo- the dawn of a new era for the Memphis Skate Community

Dogs rescue abandoned baby

Dogs "rescue" girl abandoned by mother

"The dogs removed the soil around and began to bark and the baby started crying which drew attention of the local villagers," Ram Narayan Sahani, a senior government official, said on Tuesday from Bihar's Samastipur district.

See! Dogs rule!

Snooping on the kid's myspace

And I found this "survey". Most of it was just boring, but I really liked this one:

Can you play guitar hero?
yes but i dont its to easy i play hardcore electric guitar

Damnit! Now I want IHOP!

They should check out Six Flags over Jesus

AKA Bellevue Baptist. Talk about lucrative...

Psychics see big trouble over new laws

"The psychic industry is huge and lucrative and it exploits some very vulnerable, and some very gullible, people with claims for which there is no scientific evidence."

LOL!

I'm in the process of acquiring my TN Handgun Carry Permit, and in registering for my fingerprinting and background check, I have to choose my hair color.
Blue, green, orange, pink, purple and even "unknown" are choices...
In being honest, I had to chose grey...

Goldwing update

QOTD: Chrome don't get you home, but you sure look good broken down. -Rich in Nashville.

So when I pulled my front wheel to get a new tire, I removed these god-awful chrome disc covers, like this: Chrome disc covers

They were a bit rusty & bent up, so I figured no one would want them on ebay, so I chunked them.

Fast forward to me putting the wheel back on. The calipers are rubbing the discs, and won't align properly. After going back and forth with a couple of guys on a wing forum, I decide to make a spacer , ~1/8", to take the place of the covers. What do you know? Worked like a charm. I even got to finally use my bench grinder I bought a year ago that's been in my car trunk all this time, to trim the spacer down a bit :)

Moving on to the back brakes, I needed to rebuild the rear master cylinder. Took me almost a damn hour to get the rear master cylinder off. It's missing some parts (I *think* just a spring, should be in the rebuild kit), but it's awfully rusty where the rubber boot had a hole. I've got it soaking in alcohol, and hopefully it'll clean up good.

I also *finally* got the fucking front brake light switch off! The head is kinda screwed up, I was going to replace it, but it's got some weird rod thing on the end of it?!?! I'm hoping I can clean the head up a bit & reuse it.

Tomorrow I'll scrub the MC, and put the rebuild kit in, put the brake light switch in, bleed both brakes, bolt on a mirror, and I'll be almost ready. Get a headlight on the next night & I'll be riding, working out the bugs :)

You are a pirate!

The Disgusters

The band is back. There will be vomit. There will be blood. There will be sex. There will be drugs. There will be an aural assault that the world has never experienced before. Look out. This is the year of, The Disgusters!

Not even 3 times a week

Rich seems to think I update every day. Not even close, bud!

I just went outside to smoke. WTF? Snow???

Had a great weekend. Went to the Al Chymia Shrine Circus on Friday night, with VIP tickets my friend Jerry gave me. We got to sit on the floor, front row, right next to center ring. The girls rode the elephant, got their faces painted, and took pictures with a huge boa constrictor. The most exciting part for them was when the clowns asked them to be part of the act! I tell you, those poor clowns sure looked silly when these two little girls saved them from being crushed by the "heavy" weights :) The animal acts were good, the trapeze acts were good, it was all good. We all had a ton of fun.

Saturday we took Ramona to the shooting range. I rented a couple of .22s for her to try out. Mainly I wanted her to not be scared, and to know how to be safe around firearms. As long as they are going to be in the house, she should be educated in firearm safety. She did very well, especially considering she's never shot before. She got 3 bulls-eyes :) I had forgotten that Saturday is ".223 and shotgun night". So there were a lot of "M-16s" of various flavours there. Every time one would be fired, Ramona would flinch. They're awfully loud :) After that, we went to CiCi's for dinner.

Sunday was a lazy day, but that's ok. Ramona needed to wind down & get ready for her TCAPs this week, anyway. Fun stuff!

Cool project

Kettering University student Will Foster builds fully operational half-size Panzer tank

"I took it home, driving it around in this white picket fence neighborhood and one of the neighbors called the cops on us," said Foster, a Kettering University student who began building the tank from scratch nearly two years ago.

An old story

I posted this someplace else, and I hate to waste a perfectly good write-up of a good story...
--------

At my GF's work party. Picture me all dressed up, at a restaurant where one meal costs as much as my food budget for 2 weeks. Bossman was showing pictures of the Sporty he bought his wife for Christmas, so she could ride with him while he's on his Softail. Then he started going on about getting a sports bike, for when he wants to go fast.

"I think I'll get a VRod."

I barely notice my girlfriend tensing her whole body, praying that I won't embarrass her. She knows me better than I do. I really don't know why my mouth opened and words spewed forth.

"Why the hell would you want one of those?!?!?"

You could suddenly hear the dishwasher's cigarette hiss as he tossed it in the puddle outside. All conversation stopped.

"Why do you say that?" he asked, in a tone of voice that I'm sure has terrified many an opposing counsel.

"I mean, I understand that you want a performance motorcycle, but you should really look at some of the other options. A Hayabusa or GSX, maybe. If you just can't stand to buy a Jap bike, look at the Ducati's. Harley does what they do alright, but sportsbikes really aren't their thing."

About that time the waitress with our salads and all attention was drawn to my 1/4 head of lettuce with ranch on the side. (Hey, how was I supposed to know that they have a "Wedge". When she asked what kind of salad I wanted, I just said I wanted the regular old lettuce kind with ranch. No greek or whatever. I didn't really know there where so many different kinds of salad. The steak was good, though..)

On Monday my girlfriend called to tell me that bossman had stopped her in the hall to say, "You know, your boyfriend was right..." Apparently that rarely happens.


On an unrelated note, later that year his wife lost control of her Sporty, and ended up in a ditch. Most women of her social class would not only never have ridden again, but insisted their husband stop riding. She, on the other hand, insisted on picking the repaired bike up from the shop and riding it home herself...

How about a disposable car?

Had a talk with someone yesterday & the concept of a disposable car came up. Here's a discussion weighing the merits and, um, demerits(?).

Good thing I don't have to figure it out for myself...

Women’s attractiveness judged by software by ZDNet's Roland Piquepaille -- According to Haaretz, an Israeli team of computer scientists has developed a software that ranks facial attractiveness of women. Instead of identifying basic facial characteristics, this software has been designed to make aesthetic judgments -- after training. The lead researcher said this program 'constitutes a substantial advance in the development of artificial intelligence.' It is interesting to note that the researchers focused on women only. Apparently, men' faces are more difficult to grade. But read more...

Quote of the day

"I will form good habits
and become their slaves."

— Og Mandino

Good thing I never got that shaft ampallang

Nipple rings fall foul of airport check.

..."As Ms. Hamlin struggled to remove the piercing behind the curtain, she could hear a growing number of predominantly male TSA officers snickering in the background," the attorney said...

I want a laptop like this

Datamancer's Steampunk Laptop

Do, a deer, a female deer

I sure hope you all had a nice Zombie Jesus Day, aka Easter.

Today when I was leaving work, there were two deer in the grass near my car. I was downwind, so I watched them for about 5 minutes. They were spooked, though, and never took their eyes off me. Finally they flashed their white flags at me and took off.

PSA

Why *don't* we have something like this in the US?

Dream

As all dreams are, this one was a bit disjointed. It was strange that I actually remembered it, I usually don't remember my dreams.

I was staying in a duplex down the street from my house, one that I've never seen before, but similar to the one I lived in when Sam first moved in with me. (Even now I think I should recognise it, I know I've seen it, and I can't remember whose it was.) I knew it wasn't my house, I was renting it for some reason. My mom was there, hanging out with me for a couple of weeks. I was sick, and not leaving the house. I don't remember what we talked about or did, I just remember lying on the bed and her being in the same room. After a couple of weeks she left. I was still sick. J came over to check on me. I was trying to tell her about my mom being there when I noticed my boss's white Hummer pulling up. I wasn't sure how either of them found me. I'm pretty sure I rented the duplex so I couldn't be found while I was sick. I suppose I should have moved farther than down the street, though. Boss said they were just worried about me, since they hadn't heard from me. Then he felt my head & said, "Yep, it's moved from your chest to your head." I felt that was true, and the resulting fever is what caused me to spend so much time with mom.

Around then is when I woke up. Earlier that night I had really bad heartburn. Almost the worst I've ever had. In the distant past, I've had "fever dreams" that involved collecting a million pennies to save my mom's life. Interesting that she popped up in this (apparently) illness-influenced dream.

There's a lot of things that have become obvious to me as a result of this dream. I'm not sure if I'm ready to put them up for public consumption at this time. Maybe.

Woman Sat on Toilet for 2 Years

It appeared the 35-year-old Ness City woman's skin had grown around the seat...
"It just kind of happened one day. She went in and had been in there a little while, the next time it was a little longer. Then she got it in her head she was going to stay — like it was a safe place for her," McFarren said.


WTF! I thought *I* knew some crazy bitches!!!

New puppy!

Ramona named her Flomar. It's from some movie, supposedly means "Big fluffy friend" in Martian. She's 10 weeks old, born Jan 10, 2008.

"Dad, does our stove and oven work?"

Gee, what a way to make me feel inferior. Yeah, ok. I tend more towards microwave & fast food. I never could cook. Ramona is fond of telling the story of the time I messed up *cold cereal*. Believe it.

So anyway, after confirming the operational status of our cooking appliances, Ramona asked if it was ok if she cooked. The next time I saw her she was making up a shopping list.

At the grocery store, she takes charge. We need this and this and where are the noodles??? At one point she informed me I wasn't good for anything. Oh, really? Why don't you say that when we get to the cashier. Oops :)

Last night she cooked dinner for me for the first time. Tortellini (sp?) alfredo and french bread. Oh yeah, somewhere she found garlic salt. A *lot* of garlic salt.

I'm not a huge fan of pasta, but it was definitely edible. More so than my cooking, which tends to cold cereal (I don't always mess it up), sandwiches, and poptarts.

Of course, that means I'm responsible for cleaning the kitchen :(

New holiday for men

Men-Every 14th of Feb you get the chance to display your fondness for your wife or girlfriend by showering her with gifts, flowers, dinner, shows and any other baubles that women find romantic. Every Valentine's Day you rack your brains for that one special, unique gift that will show your OL that you really love them more than anything.
Now ladies, I'll let you in on a little secret. Guys really don't enjoy this that much. Sure seeing that smile on your face when we get it right is priceless, but that smile is the result of weeks of blood, sweat and consideration. Another secret--guys feel left out. Thats right, left out. There's no special holiday for the ladies to show their appreciation for the men in their life. Men as a whole are either too proud or just too embarrassed to admit it. Which is why a new holiday has been created.

March 20 is now officially "Steak and Blowjob Day." Simple, effective, and self-explanatory. This holiday has been created so you ladies finally have a day to show your man just how much you love him. No cards, no flowers, no special nights on the town. The name of the holiday says it all. Just a steak and a blowjob. That's it. Finally, this twin pair of Valentine's Day and Steak and Blowjob Day will usher in a new age of love as men everywhere will try THAT much harder in Feb to ensure a more memorable March! Its like a perpetual love machine.

The word is already beginning to spread, but as with any new idea, it needs a little push to start the ball rolling. So spread the word and help bring love and peace to this crazy world.

Hmmm, I probably shouldn't have stumbled onto this page

Homemade hydrogen. AKA How to get hurt!

We did this in high school, on a Friday. Of course, instead of a battery we used a battery charger, with a slick little setup. After the experiment, Col. Sanders (I don't remember the teacher's real name. He looked like Col. Sanders, though) asked if anyone wanted to get charged up for the weekend, and held up the clips from the charger. I, being a dumbass, volunteered. I held a clip in each hand & he flipped it on. I couldn't tell you how long he left it on, I was being electrocuted :) It certainly dazed me, and random people kept coming up to me in the hall to comment that my hair was more frizzy than normal.

Bzzzztt!

garfield minus garfield

This is actually really fucking funny...

It had to start eventually

You know, when Ramona started getting interested in being boyfriend & girlfriend.

Sam borrowed her phone today, and while texting D (who had her phone) she started looking through Ramona's sent & received texts. There were a lot of texts there that worried her. Things like "OMG I missed you today!" "Baby are you feeling ok, you missed school." And most disturbing... many of the texts were ended with "love ya!" She didn't recognise the boys name. So she called the number...

It was a girl's phone.

She called me all freaking out, wanting to ask Ramona about it, but didn't want her to think she was snooping. I told her to go ahead and ask about it. It's our *job* to snoop :)

So she asked about it. Turns out the girl is in her choir class, and due to her voice she's in the primarily male section. As an inside joke, they all started calling the girls in the "boys" section male names. No girlfriend-girlfriend thing at all.

Sam talked to her, and let her know that we don't care if she likes boys or girls, and whatever orientation she ended up being we'd still love her and support her. She also pointed out that whatever she does, she should be discreet about dating stuff when she's at school, because kids can be very cruel.

No worries yet :)

There's no way in hell

Otto would fucking kill me in my sleep, then eat my face...

Police dogs get shoes for "paw patrol"

Another fun Friday night...

A guy from work asked if I wanted to shoot some pool a couple of nights ago. "A lot of bikers hang out there, you'll like it". I don't go out much, but I figured what the hell, right?

He shows up with his neighbor, a squid from the local base. (No offense to Navy guys, but around here just about anytime I've been randomly assaulted it's been a drunk squid).

As we're shooting pool & they're drinking their beer (I'm a water guy), I noticed that there were plenty of colors around. I guesstimated about 20 Boozefighters were hanging out. No big deal. Until the owner of the bar, a Boozefighter, accuses the squid of bowing up on him. Squidboy was drunk, and ready to go. I believe the quote was "that motherfucker needs to put on a hunnerd pounds before he starts something with me."

Just before things went too far, I stepped up, started pulling this mofo back & said "this is just a misunderstanding. No one was trying to offend anyone." and got the situation calmed down a bit. When he resisted, I explained the situation to him. "I don't care who he is! The US Navy is the biggest fucking gang there is!" At the time there was only one of his "gang" there, but the 3 of us were completely surrounded. Call me a pussy if you want, but I felt just like I was in the end of the Wild Hogs movie. Without the happy ending.

We finally got the fuck out of there. They went to the next bar, I went home. Found out later they got kicked out of 3 bars that night, all due to squidboy.

Now it'll be another 2-3 years before I bother to go anywhere with anyone :)

Common Ties

Common Ties is simple. We ask the world 20 Questions and look for answers that tell, in 50 words or less, stories that trigger strong emotional reactions. We then pair these answers with art – submitted by writers themselves or other artists – and call them jeles. We publish 10 every Friday.

One Million Monkeys Typing

An evolutionary writing site. Only the strongest stories survive. – Simian Simon

"Are Women Human?"

"If You Want Closure in Your Relationship, Start With Your Legs"

Full throttle!!!

So most victims of online sex predators *know* they're talking to a predator?

WTF?!?!

Study rejects Internet sex predator stereotype

"Wolak said teens who engaged in risky online behavior--having buddy lists that included strangers, discussing sex online with strangers, being rude online--were much more likely to be targeted.

"One of the big factors we found is that offenders target kids who are willing to talk to them online. Most kids are not," Wolak said."

New R.E.M. video x 100s

R.E.M. open-sources its music videos:

I've never been a huge REM fan, but this is still pretty cool.

H-E-Doublehockeysticks!

moar humorous pics

Aha!

Looks like I suck AND swallow...

Happy Hallmark Day!

Suckers!

I wonder who sings this song

Weird

According to this Candidate Calculator, I'm an 80% match for Mike Huckabee.

While I'm here, here's a nice informal, unscientific study that shows which books make you dumb. I mostly run to the 1200 range...

I think I understand now

At first I couldn't believe Sesame Street was "not suitable for children", but after seeing this video short of the Count, I think I get it now.

Get down with the sickness

Ramona is sick today, her stomach hurts and she's "dizzy". Most likely due to her staying up all night listening to the tornado sirens :(

The joys of TN vehicle inspection

I had a meeting at the school to confirm Ramona's continued eligibility for CLUE. When I left, I was driving past the inspection station & noticed they had a short line. Since it's warm out today & my car was acting right & my tags expire this month, I jetted in & got the inspection done. Passed with flying colors! :)

Yay! for not waiting until the last minute!

"I'm down five"

Whenever you eat, you're swallowing spit...

Oh! Oh! Oh! I want one!

It's *practically* a bionic eye! You can just call me the 6 million dollar man!